Sunday, January 11, 2009

A Reminder

All evidence to the contrary, my son is NOT broken and does NOT need to be fixed.

We are not bad or ineffective parents, that is not why he acts the way he does.

Yes, we have tried ____ and _____ and no they didn't work.

We appreciate the advice, but in the short amount of time I have spent chatting with you, it is unlikely you have anything magical to offer us.

I am very aware that he is an extraordinarly difficult child, in fact, I live with him, so I am VERY aware of it, so I don't really need you pointing it out to me.

I do appreciate you pointing out the good things you notice about him, they make my heart sing too.

He is loved, and we are not sorry we adopted him.

I think I am going to have a t-shirt made that says the above.

21 Kids Who Want To Play:

Me said...

Do a group of us need to get together and beat someone up for you? Sounds like someone is giving you a hard time, and that just ain't gonna work!

Lisa said...

I'll join "Me's" group. That is just not acceptable.

It must be going around because Dinah wrote on this too:
http://littlewondersathome.blogspot.com/2009/01/please-dont-judge.html

Torina said...

Ugh. This happens way too often. Maybe you could try...or...just kidding ;)

Azul said...

Save yourself some ink and just print the following:

Be Kind or SHUT UP.

I'll take one in Large ;).

Bonnie the Boss said...

Are you having problems with peole judging? I hate that! They have no idea what your circumstances are.

Lana said...

Rock on, Mama!!! ☺

Kristina P. said...

I do like to punch people in the face. Let me at them!

Yondalla said...

((HUG))

pam said...

People always think they know better than you do. Instead of criticizing people should be saying how can I help and honestly mean it.

Good luck, I am with you and here to support you!

angryyoungwoman said...

You rock. I think you are the greatest.

K J and the kids said...

I'm sorry you need the t-shirt.
I honestly knew someone who passed out cards when she would go to the grocery store or to a restaurant.
She got sick of explaining her sons behavior when they would go out.
Maybe post it notes that you could slap or STAPLE to their forheads. :) hee hee....Just a suggestion.

Ambitious Blonde said...

I'm sorry that you were accosted by an idiot and that it has given you the angries. I'd happily join Me's group and administer some vigilante shovel justice if you thought that might help.

Oh, and "He's autistic. What's YOUR problem?" and "I'm terribly sorry your mama didn't raise you right" work really well at shutting people up. Use them as you see fit. :)

Jillene said...

I am a brawler by nature. Let me at um!! I am sorry that you have to listen to this crap. Don't people understand that it doesn't matter--that you LOVE him and that is what matters?!

Susie said...

So not acceptable. These people have never walked in your shoes and I feel sad for them. Children like Little Man are a gift from God and only a few people are chosen to be their parents. Maybe whoever said this is just jealous that she wasn't chosen to parent a "special" child.

Teresa said...

Here are a few more T-Shirt ideas for you....

"Thanks, but I don't remember asking you for advice."
or
"I'll tell you where you can put your advice."
or better
"Never judge a man until you've walked a mile in in his moccasins" :0)

My husband recently lost his job because his company is going under. We are getting all sorts of unsolicited advice and everyone wants to put in their two cents about the situation. I HATE it. Can't imagine if the situation revolved around one of my children. I am SO SORRY!

Jenny said...

Righteous ignorance is always the hardest to handle.

And if there is going to be a brawl you know I want to be a part of that! ;)

Soxy Deb said...

Oh count me as a gang member of "me's" group too. You know how much I love confrontation. There seem to be a few of us here who would love a crack at 'em. Just point us in the right direction.

Holly said...

Sorry you've been dealing with this. Unfortunately it comes with the territory, but that too is no excuse. Know you aren't walking this journey alone though.

B said...

I have to say I totally agree with the comment, "He is loved, and we are not sorry we adopted him." Because people assume I don't love my child we got through adoption. Because how can you?! I wish people could stop being so shallow and see we are mothers who love our KIDS no matter who they are or how we got them. But maybe those people don't know how to really love.

elizasmom said...

Dannnng. It's like backseat parenting, squared, huh? So sorry!

Kristine said...

I'd take one of those t-shirts.

I'd like to staple one of those post-it notes to my parents forehead too.

You know I SO get it.