Sunday, August 06, 2006

Am I Bad?

I did the big No-No today. But before I tell you what I did, you need to know the background info so you can understand why what I did was such a no-no. Church, (it is sunday after all!) in our Church, it is all volunteer, no one is paid. Families go to church, that means kids too, and with Mormons, it means ALOT of kids. We have three meetings. Sacrament meeting, singing, talks, taking of the Sacrament, (communion) bread and water stuff. Families all attend Sacrament meeting, from newborns to the very old. Sunday school which is divided into classes according to ages for the kids. Children under 12 years old go to primary for the following two hours. Kids older than 12 go to sunday school and then Young Womens or Young Mens, the grown ups go to Sunday School and then Relief Society for the women, and Priesthood for the men. How people get into teaching these classes is they are "called" into them by inspiration, (desperation I think sometimes!) I have been called as a Sunday school teacher for the grownups, I taught that for 5 years, loved it, taught Relief society and in the early years of my marriage I taught primary for about 9 years.
Today after church, Bald Man said someone from the Bishopric wanted to talk to us. Uh oh, calling time! I was hoping for like Ward Newsletter. Nope, they wanted to call me to Primary. Uh, not so hot with Little Man. He has a ton of anxiety about me. He can not see me and not have me. When he sees me, he must be on me, near me, having his hands in my hair. I tried to teach Primary in our last ward, went to hell for the following three weeks. Little Man screamed himself hysterical in the car with Bald Man while I was teaching and then proceeded to fill the rest of our Sabbath Days with melt downs. I gave up. I figure Jesus loves my boy as much as He loves anyone and he never meant for my child to be as miserable as he was.
So today, without saying outright no, I did say that I thought and Bald Man said his piece about how this probably would not be a good thing for our boy. We would be willing to try it, but it would most likely not work with our boy's needs.
Because these callings come from God, saying no is frowned upon, so it was with trepidation we sort of said no, but wanted to make sure we were willing but not able. Our bishopric took it well and withdrew the request quite nicely. And I must say they were most understanding about our boy's needs.
I must say the LAST calling I would want is teaching primary. I have a young man here, who is more work than most newborns, and honestly on Sunday, I just want a break, thanks, but no thanks. Ward Newsletter, God, please???

5 Kids Who Want To Play:

A thinker said...

Good for you! I think you've got your priorities right ;)

Jenny said...

What a tough situation. Why don’t you just volunteer? Do you have to be called by someone other then yourself?

My Perspective: My knowledge of the processes of religion is sometimes small. I was raised by hippie parents who rejected organized religion and taught us “Do onto others” but that may have been more about politics then the afterlife. Of course there were stories around the holidays that definitely leaned towards Catholicism with a dash of Buddhism on top. I have a hard time grasping the idea that God would speak to someone and have a message for me. (I hope that didn't come across as insulting) I guess I have the idea that God is a scientist creating it all and then standing back to see what happens, like putting the vinegar in the baking soda and then enjoying the show only stepping in to stir it up sometimes. But at the same time I also believe that Infinity is a reality (mathematically and metaphorically) – totally leaving room for miracles and the divine.

Jo said...

Jenny, not the least bit insulted. I would say that I am not a typical Mormon, I wasn't raised in this church and you have to add my Native culture in there that I was raised on also. What I do know, is God, Great Spirit, whatever you wish to identify as the source of power, wants me here, a Mormon tangled with Native roots, so I do my best making sense of the whole thing. The Church encourages us to be prayerful and thoughtful in our own decisions but the people in the church often do the exact opposite and do without prayer or thinking and think that the local leadership is next to God. So I am often at odds with the Church culture, although rarely at odds with the Church doctrine. I hope that makes sense! And that is why what Bald Man and I did was a cultural no-no, not a doctrinal no-no. It is hard to explain, but I wanted to explain our situation to others. Thanks for listening!

CaerLiveSound said...

Don't feel bad! Your baby needs you more than the grown-ups at church! If they saw him screaming and crying for you, I'm sure every one of them in your class would tell you to be with him.

The difference between Little Man and the Grown-Ups is that Little Man can't understand why his mom needs to do anything without him. The Grown-Ups CAN understand why you can't be there with them.

Jane said...

Wow. Difficult situation. I am a Catholic, and one thing I admire about your Church (from what little I know) is the level of mutual help and members' participation. The Catholic Church didn't always encourage participation by the laity, though things have changed for the better since I was a little girl. Anyway, I hope your leaders realize that now, and maybe for quite a while, you need to put your family first. Call it your "Home Ministry" if you need to!